


Five Times Ruby Said No to Mistletoe and One Time She Allowed It

by cminerva



Series: The Cobbler Verse [4]
Category: Longmire (TV)
Genre: Christmas Party, Gen, Lucian is an old goat, Ruby is the best, a little moment for Mathias & Ruby, background Ferg/Meg, someone has to keep this town in line
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:21:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28266078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cminerva/pseuds/cminerva
Summary: Ruby has a firm policy surrounding mistletoe in the office. Just a quick fic about Ruby trying to maintain a little order in this mess of a county. (Not in a strict 5+1 format but you'll get the idea.)
Series: The Cobbler Verse [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1980913
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8
Collections: Longmire Holiday Exchange





	Five Times Ruby Said No to Mistletoe and One Time She Allowed It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Myself](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Myself/gifts).



> Loosely based on the prompt '5 times the mistletoe went wrong +1 where it went right'.
> 
> The final scene is set during a holiday party that you’ll learn more about once Mess and I write the dang thing! 
> 
> Also if you haven't read at least the first two fics within The Cobbler Verse I recommend doing that first. (Though the third is relevant too!)

Mistletoe had long been banned from the Absaroka County Sheriff's office. This rule dated back to the year Sheriff Connelly tried to work a little Christmas magic on the new part-time secretary. The petite Ms. Ruby crossed her arms and looked up at the mischievous sheriff with a stern expression.

“Lucian Connelly, mistletoe is for teenagers and Christmas movies, not grown men in the workplace. Now take that down right now and get yourself over to that stretch of 156 behind Dale Goodwin’s place. Until you hire yourself another deputy, you’re on roadkill duty.”

There was enough drama in the county without adding to it in the office and Ruby did her best to keep the sheriff’s department running smoothly so that the perpetually understaffed crew of deputies could focus on their work. 

(Ruby wasn’t opposed to mistletoe under the right circumstances, though she did put a moratorium on the greenery in her own home after her husband nearly fell off a stepladder trying trying to put some up for their first Christmas as Mr. & Mrs. Ruby assured him they could keep kissing just as well without the prompting. Their daughter’s birthday the following autumn proved that well enough.)

Everyone who worked at the sheriff’s office knew about Ruby’s zero tolerance policy for the Christmas greenery, but the occasional amorous visitor needed to be educated. During his second year as a deputy, Branch’s girlfriend of the moment made it two steps into the office wearing a perky santa hat and carrying a sprig of mistletoe before Ruby sent her right back out. Branch had to run after the annoyed woman, hat in hand, to soften the blow. He had grumbled a bit about Ruby’s rule after that incident, but he was without allies. Vic was particularly vocal about her support of this policy. She had been deeply mortified her first winter in Absaroka when her husband showed up with a bright bouquet of flowers and mistletoe as a surprise. Ruby gave Sean a quick lesson on office policies and sent him right out with the offending bouquet. Vic trailed after her bemused husband and mouthed a silent “thank you” to Ruby on the way.

Eventually most of the county was clear on Ruby’s no-mistletoe policy (and general ban on fooling around in the office); the sheriff and his deputies might struggle to keep the county in line but inside the office, Ruby maintained order.

Despite the decades that had passed since his first attempt at office mischief, when she arrived at the office one December day to find a wrapped bundle of mistletoe on the corner of her desk, Ruby was not at all surprised to see the retired Sheriff Connelly lounging in the chair that had once belonged to his nephew.

“I thought we settled this years ago,” Ruby said by way of greeting, waving the wrapped greenery under Lucian’s nose.

Lucian threw up his hands in a dramatic show of innocence.

“It wasn’t me! Pretty sure that kid, what’s his name - Ferg - dropped ‘em there on his way by.”

The “kid” in question emerged from Walt’s office at that moment and his eyes went wide when he saw Ruby holding up the bundle of mistletoe accusingly.

“Ferguson, I thought you knew better!”

“I do know better, Ruby!” Ferg insisted. “I was just on my way out to surprise Meg at the hospital. I thought I’d be gone before you got in!”

Ruby shook her head at the young deputy’s anxious face and took pity on him.

“Well go on, get out of here,” she told him, handing off the mistletoe and shooing him towards the door. “Give my best to Meg.”

Ferg made a dash for the door as Lucian chuckled and sipped his coffee.

Ruby was hardly a grinch and she could enjoy a little frivolity as much as anyone, so long as it was at the right time and place. So when her grandchild, Quinn cheekily strung up mistletoe throughout Ruby’s living room before the big Christmas party, she just laughed and pressed a kiss to Quinn’s dark green hair.

Ruby joined in Quinn’s amusement as the other partygoers noticed the decorations. Walt grazed the top of his head against one of the boughs then gave it a brief moment of consideration before issuing a quiet “nope” and continuing on his way. Ferg blushed red and sent a questioning glance at Ruby, clearly needing her reassurance that this was okay, before permitting his girlfriend to kiss him. 

For her part, Ruby accepted sticky embraces from the neighbor’s children, neatly sidestepped Lucian when he met her in the doorway (“I’ve been refusing your kisses for nearly forty years, I’m not about to stop now”), and dutifully exchanged kisses with Quinn every time they breezed past. When Mathias passed by and noticed the mistletoe that had migrated to the hallway Ruby chuckled at his flushed face - a holdover from the youthful crush he’d harbored for her so many years ago - and offered her cheek, which he gallantly leaned in to kiss. They shared an amused look at the flurry of sound and movement down the hall that could only mean Quinn had witnessed the exchange. Sure enough Ruby’s grandchild was pink-faced with glee, their arms flung around a startled but amused May. Mathias let out a long sigh and Ruby patted his arm before sending him off to rescue his date. Then she fixed Quinn with a firm stare and they bounced down the hall, hands in their pockets and projecting an air of carefully cultivated innocence.

“Yes, Nana?” Their nonchalant tone was notwithstanding, Ruby had a that feeling the mistletoe may have been moved throughout the evening in an attempt to engineer a meeting between herself and Quinn’s favorite police chief.

‘“I think it’s time to retire the mistletoe,” Ruby said, earning a disappointed groan from Quinn. “For this year at least. Oh, and Quinn?”

“Yeah?

“ _All_ of it.”


End file.
